Would the “Golden Bachelor” who dumped Minneapolis fitness instructor Leslie Fhima on national TV do things differently, if he could do them over again? In a word: Yes.

“I have a couple regrets and, you being in Minneapolis, Leslie is top of mind in the things I regret, things I’d have done differently,” said Turner by phone in mid-October, while promoting memoir “Golden Years,” which is out Nov. 4.

Instead of Fhima, Turner chose Theresa Nist, and they were briefly married although “Golden Years” depicts Nist as more interested in fame than romance (they’re divorced; Turner recently became engaged to retired teacher Lana Sutton).

I asked Turner how his emotional goodbye to Fhima might have played out differently, how they’re doing now, whether he’s friendly with Nist (no) and whether the picture viewers get on “Golden Bachelor” jibes with reality. The following has been edited for concision and clarity:

What would you have done differently?

I would have tried to be more honest, even if it was unfortunate, in my communication with Leslie. If I could do it over, I would try to be more brutally honest, rather than holding off until the very last minute. l do want to add I said some very nice things about Leslie in the book. She’s a favorite of mine. I’m a fan of hers. I wish her happiness every day. And, to my pleasant surprise, Leslie was the very first person to reach out to me and congratulate me once my engagement [to Sutton] was public on social media. That just goes to show how much of a class person she is. [The Minnesota Star Tribune reached out to Fhima’s representatives at ABC to confirm but they did not get back to us.]

Was it tough to relive moments like the Leslie goodbye when you wrote the book?

There were times it was very difficult. Writing about certain times, particularly the rose ceremonies, I would be conveyed back to the emotions I felt those nights. I had such heartbreaking moments with these women, who I thought were very elegant and very graceful and intelligent. I had worked so hard to learn about them and become friends with them, only then to be a traitor to them and send them home. On the other hand, there were a lot of joyful moments, when I wrote about Leslie and Nancy [Hulkower] and Faith [Turner]. Kathy [Swarts] and Susan [Flores], of course, I would like to think I changed perspective of those two, from what maybe they were seen as on the show, particularly Kathy. She was a little bit of a villain on my season and that was certainly not the case.

Based on the book, you’re not in a great place with Theresa?

I would say that’s a true statement.

Any hope of that improving?

In the general population of divorced people, where there are ex-husbands and ex-wives, when there are no children, is there any motivation to stay close to each other? I don’t see this as any different from that. We don’t have any common interests or commonalities. So, no, we haven’t been in touch.

Do you feel like the version of you on the show is the real you?

I think it only shows part of the story. I have a lot more depth to offer than what is seen in the brief moments of the show.

Any advice for viewers who are watching reality TV and trying to figure out how real it is?

Maybe the only comment I would make there is that to reserve judgment and be sympathetic to all of the people on a reality show. Don’t judge harshly and prematurely, because there’s so much that is not seen.

Are you watching the new season of “Golden Bachelor?”

I’m dying to. I watched the first episode and then Lana and I have been traveling. We just yesterday got back from the East Coast so I haven’t caught up yet. But I can’t wait.

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Golden Years: What I’ve Learned from Love, Loss and Reality TV

By: Gerry Turner.

Publisher: Grand Central, 224 pages.

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